Blue sat in the chair across from the bed. The rest of the
room was empty, I wasn’t sure if I was dreaming or awake. He sat up in his
chair as I woke up, “hey you” he said quietly.
“Hey.” I whispered.
He stood up and moved over to the bed, “how you feeling?”
“With my fingers.” It was the smart ass comment my granddad
always used.
He chuckled, “I’m so glad to see you haven’t lost your sense
of humor.”
“How’s the bike?” I asked.
He sighed, “She probably saved your life.”
I laughed thinking about how she had done it more then once,
thinking about the ride to Hill City
“Maybe more then one.” He said. “You scared us.”
I sighed and thought to myself for a little bit. I wasn’t
sure I wanted to admit I didn’t want to ride anymore, I knew he was more apt to
understand then D would. “I want to stop riding.” I whispered as my watery eyes
met his blue ones. It hurt me to admit it.
He sighed and took my hand in his, “remember why you started
riding? If you stop you are going to lose it all.”
It was then the tears started, “I’ve lost it all anyways.”
I sobbed as I heard myself admit it for the first time. Admitting
I’d lost my best friend and the only man I’d ever loved ripped my heart out of
my chest, it was a pain that the pain meds wouldn’t stop.
“That’s the first step.” Blue said as he wrapped his arms
around me, “Just get it all out. We will figure riding out later.”
The doctor came in after a bit, told me I was still in shock
and changed my IV fluids. I fell asleep in Blue’s arms. I slept like I’d never
slept before, without dreams, away from the pain, just honest sleeping…
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