The New Life: What Roy Says Goes

The first time Big Roy visited me we didn’t have a conversation, we didn’t speak, we only acknowledged each other. As Sweet Cheeks and I loped hard across the South meadow I felt the urge to look over my shoulder and there he and Laker were, keeping in stride with us.

The next time he came I had honestly had way to much to drink, it may have been my imagination, but I’d like to think it was really him. It was the night I found out Charming had been cheating on me with his ex-girlfriend.

Roy stood in the room, it was dark and I could hardly see him, but he was there, I knew it. When I sat up in bed and stared at him I could see him better, “is it really you?” I asked.

He chuckled, “who else would it be?”

I sighed, “I don’t know. I’ve just been having some funny experiences lately.”

He smiled, “you’re becoming more sensitive.”

I shrugged and wrapped the covers around me, “I guess.”

“I met Sonny. She’s one hell of a woman. I can see so much of you in her.” He said softly.

I nodded, “She’s awesome. I’m glad you came and all but why?”

He chuckled and crossed his arms across his chest, “What you did wasn’t the answer.”

I sighed and rubbed my eyes, “I know.”

“Well if you know, why did you do it?” He asked

“Because it seemed like the answer at the time.” I said softly.

He sighed and sat down on the corner of the bed, “Not everyone is going to hurt you. I really think you need to talk to this man and hear his side of the story. Is it possible what you are hearing is a rumor from someone who doesn’t want to see you happy?”

I pulled my knees into my chest and thought for a moment, “yes.”

He nodded, “I want you to understand the past is the past. Sometimes you dwell in it and just live in the bitterness. You can’t live there; you can’t keep that in your heart. You need to learn to move on.”

I nodded as the tears welled.

“Just say goodbye and let it be that.” Roy said.

I knew what he was talking about, whom exactly I was supposed to say goodbye to.

“If you need to justify it to yourself, he wasn’t there when you got sick, and he hasn’t been there since. He’s no longer the man you fell in love with and the sooner you face it the better you are going to feel.” He said softly.

I nodded, “your right.”

“So just tell him goodbye.” Roy said softly.

I nodded again, “yes sir.”

He smiled, “Don’t feel that way girl, don’t. Not even for one second. Your life is going to be amazing if you learn to just go with the flow. You can not force anything to happen, God doesn’t work that way. Sometimes when you fall you just have to stand up, smile and move on, because that’s the only option you’ve got.”

I sighed, “Yes sir.”

“Give the good ones a second chance. They need it. Especially this new guy, because what you’ve heard happened with him, didn’t really, that I can promise you.”

“Yes sir.”

He smiled and gave me a hug, “Your world is just beginning. You’ve got lots of time; everything is going to work out for the best.”

I could feel his warmth for a second, “yes sir.” I started to cry as I realized he was gone.